I know the position that I have taken recently in our student ministries is that we are coming along side the parents and serving them in the spiritual development of their teens. We did this as an effort to change the shift from us raising the teens to them raising their teens spiritual. That said, yes there is an exception to every rule like kids that have been left alone with no hope of parents stepping in etc… But we try to provide an atmosphere and resources that empower the parents that are present in their teens lives.

Last thing I was at the SEEDS conference at Church On The Move and during the Student Ministries sessions one of the things I took away was eliminate anything that would cause the parents to distrust you. That is not saying to bend theology but if it would cause a parent to think that you didn’t think of all the details that would keep their teen safe then it probably shouldn’t be done, like eating cereal out of a kiddy pool with 15 of their friends.

So, Tom… if you’re going to do youth ministry the way God leads you, what if the way God is leading you is to challenge you through parents who disagree with you… and who do it by bullying you? 😉

Sarcasm aside, as well, I mentioned I was short-sighted on this back in the day. Thankfully, that gave me some foresight to consider how it might have played out this round – not because I’m inherently smart in the present, but because I was inherently dumb in the past.

So the question is what are you and I being short-sighted on today that will need correction we may not be poised to hear? The Old Testament has some humbling examples of how God tried to get the attention of His people internally, but they thought they knew better. Then He’s have to send in someone from the outside – often someone with a sword – to reset the people back to right thinking. Other times it was something more agricultural or biological.

That’s all I’m offering here… let’s pay better attention now to our own “assumed expertise” so that we don’t create the very plagues (be it sick kids or angry parents) that we’d rather avoid in the long run anyway.

Sarcasm aside, the “I’m a bit steamed” attitude about a youth group game that may expose their children to germs seems a bit extreme to me.

The longer we remain in ministry, the more we realize we have many different ideas and expectations from the parents of our students. We will never be able to meet the expectations of all of them. We play games that are too rough. We play games that are too gross. We play games that spread germs. We are too strict on our dress code. We shouldn’t talk about homosexuality.

Here is my balance: I will do youth ministry the way God leads me, with my personality He has chosen to use, When parents object, prayerfully consider the objection and follow the Holy Spirit’s guidance. Sometimes I am wrong, sometimes there is a better way, and sometimes I have done it just the way God led me to. Never be bullied by parents personal preferences alone. And respectfully and gently communicate your position to the parents. Some will get it, some won’t. And that’s OK, I refuse to revert to video conferencing just to avoid some germs.