Comments on: 3 Incorrect Assumptions About Church Kids

By: Bill Mayer

Bill Mayer — Sat, 24 Jan 2015 12:34:48 +0000

In reply to Wade Allen. Excellent point!!!

By: Lauren Heller

Lauren Heller — Mon, 19 Jan 2015 20:37:03 +0000

Praying for relationship with Jesus:

This weekend I learned a powerful prayer. I tripped on it at my sons basketball game. In other words I realized it’s value and Jesus brought it’s value home to me because I tried to pray it whenever my son got the ball. I want you to know he was in a slump for several games. (He actually stopped shooting and played excellent games of service to his team, because he could not make baskets.) I was pleased for his response to a big problem, but was ready to get his eyes checked. There was no time for that.

In the final game of a tournament against a tough team for the championship, he had 25 points. Nearly every shot he put up, plus rebounds etc. Truly the only shots he did not make, I was distracted or slow to pray for him. I was not taking the gift of this prayer seriously, I had no clue what Jesus was up to.

I am convinced Jesus was trying to get through to me how much He loves the prayers of parents and all people who care. I don’t expect life to be a cake walk because I learned this prayer, challenges are always around the corner. My Lord can provide a response for me if I let Him. I hope to continue to do my part ‘Joining Jesus in His Redemptive Mission’ through this prayer and by fostering an attitude of gratitude, conversations, reading God’s word, enjoying faith filled music together, and repentant…forgiven worship. It is really not about me or my son or about sports. Sports was only a tool used to show me, at a time when Jesus had my complete attention, the awesome value of His presence. In other words, it is about Jesus.

My prayer problem has been a continuing battle: I want to control how my prayers work. Lately, that has been remarkably ineffective. I am thankful to be trusting Jesus more each day. His will is what is best for us. He is God with us. His will is for us to invite and recognize and value His presence in our hearts and for us to allow Him to work there. It is not always comfortable but it is always important. We can be still and then be present to Jesus as He leads us to _________ (parent).

Jesus is personally involved in our lives. This prayer is magnified by my frequent repentance and a pause:

Thank you Jesus for your presence _____________.

( I choose to add “in my sons heart”, “on this court”, ” in this crowd”, “in these referees” “in these coaches”I saw dramatic Christ values come out of situations that were on their way towards trouble. The people involved were probably not all Christians. Jesus is Lord of all. Not just Christians.)

It has only been one day but I began to pray for my husband and myself this way as well. We had a problem: I was sad because his humanity came out more than Christ’s presence in him a few weeks ago. I was having a hard time finding a way I could trust him to lead our family. I think this prayer will help strengthen my trust on the big stuff and allow for the growth of my husband and myself and our relationship on the little stuff. The cool thing is with this prayer: the stuff I think is little but is really big… Jesus is with him. The stuff I think is big but is little, I can still bring forward… but I don’t need to drive it home. That is Jesus’ job. I can hold Him to it. My job is to continue to thank Jesus for his presence in our hearts and be encouraged by Him as he allows me to see and be thankful for the little changes. Every thank you seems to open that door to our hearts a little further for Jesus to have His way. Proving once again, God’s will is for everyday stuff not just for hospitals and funerals.

Lauren Heller

By: Leneita Fix

Leneita Fix — Thu, 06 Nov 2014 16:44:41 +0000

In reply to Danette. Thanks so much Danette! I am always overwhelmed as a parent when a Godly person asks if they can speak into my kids lives. It's so needed!!

By: Danette

Danette — Wed, 05 Nov 2014 19:50:52 +0000

Such a great post, Leneita – thank you. I linked it on my FB with this note:
This article got me thinking about my interesting perspective as a longtime youth worker who became a parent and as a parent who remained in youth ministry.
Parent Me: Thank you to youth workers who didn’t assume my kids didn’t need you just because their mom & dad were in ministry. Thank you for investing in my kids. THANK YOU my kids, for developing your own relationship with Jesus and not feeling it has to look like mine or Dad’s.
Youth Worker Me: Thank you parents for discipling your own kids and not leaving the “spiritual stuff” up to youth workers. It’s always refreshing when I can echo your biblical values, not introduce them for the first time. Thank you parents for living your faith out loud at home. THANK YOU my kids, for appreciating your youth leaders and speaking highly of them at home. And thanks for never asking me to stop being a youth worker.

By: Wade Allen

Wade Allen — Thu, 16 Oct 2014 18:10:17 +0000

This is a reflection of the widespread “attraction” model of ministry. If the main goal for our gatherings is to bring “seekers” in, the messages and lessons taught will be – “Jesus saved me from my sins.” How can we expect kids raised in these churches to have any other answers than what they are taught every week? Until we shift our focus from “attraction” to discipleship (which then results in disciples going and making disciples), we will continue to see these responses from church kids.

By: David Watts

David Watts — Mon, 06 Oct 2014 03:44:14 +0000

I totally agree with this. I have gotten the same reactions and responses in my youth group. I also teach at the local high school and I can tell you it is systemic. Teenagers have been brought up to “build a resume”. It is all about what they ‘do’ versus who they really are. There is little depth right now and it can be frustrating trying to get through. I am feeling like I may want to spend more time with the teens’ parents in small group discussions in order to make more progress with the kids. I do spend most of my time on Sunday nights talking with kids about “them” and how our Scripture readings relate to how they are feeling in school and with friends. We rarely get through a true lesson. Relevancy is something the kids are hungry for. And unfortunately parents have not learned that either. Perhaps working with both parents and kids together can help provide some grounding.

By: Vanessa

Vanessa — Thu, 02 Oct 2014 17:38:43 +0000

You have definitely hit the nail on the head.
I have also worked with churched and nonchurched students. They all face the same struggles and we [as leaders, teachers, parents, etc] have to stop seeing them as this or that. We need to see them as students that need us to listen to them and advocate for them and with in the trails they are facing. Celebrate the victories with them!
We have always allowed for open and honest discussion in our classes with the “this is a space and confidential place”. So far, the students have respected this greatly. We try to make time for students before and after class to talk with them one on one if needed.
Digging deeper in their faith is something they all desire and it great when we has leaders ask questions that really make them think.

By: Dorie

Dorie — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 20:19:29 +0000

This could have been written when I was a teen in the 80s. During college (in a fundamental Baptist college, no less) I started to explore my faith. I wanted to know if I believed or was just following the rules. I examined what I had been taught in lessons as well as by watching how the adults really acted. It was an eye-opening experience. The process led me to Judaism. I found what I truly believed. Then I learned that I was Jewish by birth. I’m home.

Kids need to feel safe asking the hard questions. They want more than a rote belief system passed down the line with the family Bible and collection plate. It has to be real and meaningful if you want them to believe after they leave the nest. Listen. Talk. Be real.

By: John Mulholland

John Mulholland — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 18:28:38 +0000

This past Sunday, I had a kid suggest to me that the Saul of the OT and the Saul of the NT were one and the same.

Great words.

By: Leneita Fix

Leneita Fix — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 14:57:26 +0000

In reply to Josh Sumpter.

Josh- Such a great point about the parents. I hear young adults in college say often, “My parents were great,but I felt like it was all about how much we were at the church building.” Or some variation- you get it. I think in addition we just need stop being “ok” with them being lukewarm. It’s so true- the unchurched kids have no basis, so even if it’s just out of curiosity they really seek. I think we need to keep letting our “churched” kids know they haven’t “figured out the faith formula,” instead Jesus wants all of them. Thanks again for an insightful comment!